Why Being a Loner is SO MUCH Better than being in the Crowd (Part 1)

If you're anything like me, then you know what it's like to feel alone in a crowd of people. I have always been an outcast for as long I can remember. I was always the friend who was left out of group plans, the one always chosen last for teams or projects, and the one who was never included in the conversation. Yep, that's me! I have been told its because people are intimidated by my presence or they may be jealous, but I could not wrap my head around this concept. I remember I used to come home crying because I felt so alone. I even slipped into a deep depression because I felt like there was no hope for me. It sucked being alone and having no social life, but I have learned to embrace it. Through this hard journey, I found so much inner peace and I learned who I really was and I discovered what type of people I wanted in my life. With that being said, I will reveal my reasons why being a loner is so much better than being part of the crowd.

1. You can be your TRUE self

One of the most important things I have embraced about being a loner is being my true, authentic self. Being in a crowd can cause peer pressure and conformity. Many people who are in crowds look happy on the outside, but may be dying on the inside because they are pretending to be something they are not. I never been the type to change who I was to fit in. I love myself way too much for that, so if being alone meant being me, then so be it. Being a loner means that I can unapologetically state my opinions without feeling pressure from a group and I can be as goofy as I want, because I am being ME.

2. Inner Peace

Spending most of my time alone has been the gateway to my inner peace. Before I discovered it, I was so wiled-up inside. I was constantly thinking about people liking me and altering my behavior to do so. I was so caught up in the worries of the world, that I forgot about myself and my needs. Being a loner has been so peaceful because I do not have to deal with small social problems that most people submerge in. Additionally, I have learned to truly enjoy my own company. I love going to coffee shops and out to lunch alone, its just so peaceful.

3. More Independence

Being independent is one of the best feelings in the world. Not having to depend on people feels amazing and it adds to your strength. We all need help sometimes, don't get me wrong, but not needing anyone to validate you and your identity is powerful. Many people who are part of cohesive groups tend to only possess an identity because of the group and solely affiliate with the group and not by their own individuality. Being a loner means that you have your OWN identity, and you are known simply because YOU ARE YOU. In addition, being independent means that you don't NEED anyone, so if people are in your life, it's because you truly want them to be there. Ever notice how some people can't even walk to class alone or go to the bathroom alone? Yeah, that's ridiculous in my eyes. Being independent has caused me to be absolutely fearless and its liberating.

4. No Drama and Fake People

What are the biggest problems with being part of a group? Yeah, you guessed it right, DRAMA and GOSSIP. Two things that are not tolerated in my life. One of the luxuries of being a loner is not having to deal with drama because there is no one to be dramatic with! Being in large groups is nothing but drama. Everyone talks about everyone, some people are fake and pretend to like you, blah, blah, blah. You know how it goes. Being alone majority of the time eliminates this from happening or decreases it to a minimum, because there are some people who just engulf in drama and will still try to have a problem with you. But not having drama is amazing! It gives you more time to do you and focus on what's really important, which should be your goals and aspirations!

It is a human instinct to want to feel a sense of belonging, but that is not always possible for everyone, especially in today's society. With social media usage being at an all-time high, its difficult to find real people to surround yourself with. Sometimes being a loner is the best option until you find the right people. Being a loner may not seem appealing at first, but when you learn to find inner peace and comfort, it can be the best feeling in the world. Being able to be your true self in a world of masked faces is truly liberating. If you are having trouble finding your real friends, then keep referring to this article. It won't be easy at first, but I promise you, that it is the best feeling ever! I have learned to embrace my solitude so much that it is actually a preference for me. Always remember, if people cannot accept you for your true and authentic self, then they don't deserve your presence anyways!